每天等到闹钟响了好几遍还不愿意起床，该死的烟瘾怎么也戒不掉。生活为什么是这个样子的呢？我又为何不能够彻底改变下我自己呢？现在开始，好好的改变一下吧，不管过去怎么样，只要你想改变，你就一定可以改变，没有人能阻止你成功，除非你自己挡在了成功的道路上。Let us change bad habits from now and on.......
Self-change is tough, but it's not impossible, nor does it have to be traumatic, according to change expert Stan Goldberg, Ph.D. Here, he lays out the 10 principles he deems necessary for successful change.
变化专家期坦·古德伯格博士说：自我改变是困难的，但并不是不可能的，也不一定会有创伤。他列出了10条他认为是成功改变必须的原则。
My mother died on Christmas day of a massive heart attack. I later counted 15 self-help books on her shelves, but found each offered only broad ideas; none provided the specifics necessary to save her life.
我母亲在圣诞节那天因为严重的心脏病去世了。我查了她书架上的15本有关自助的书，却发现每本书只列出了宽泛的理念，没有一本提供了可以挽救她的生命的必须的细节。
Like my mother, many of us want to change but simply don't know how to do it. After 25 years of researching how people change, I've discovered 10 major principles that encompass all self-change strategies. I've broken down those principles and, using one example—a man's desire to be more punctual—I demonstrate strategies for implementing change in your own life.
就像我的母亲一样，我们大多数人都想要改变但却不知道如何去做。在对人们如何改变做了25年研究之后，我发现10条原则共同组成了自我改变的策略。我已经把这些原则分解开来，用一个实例——一个想男人想要更守时的愿望——我向你们展示了在人生中如何实现改变。
1.All Behaviors Are Complex
1.所有的行为都是复杂的。
Research by psychologist James O. Prochaska, Ph.D., an internationally renowned expert on planned change, has repeatedly found that change occurs in stages. To increase the overall probability of success, divide a behavior into parts and learn each part successively.
心理学家詹姆斯Ｏ·普罗查斯卡博士是一位国际著名的计划性改变的专家，他的研究一再证明了改变的产生是阶段性的。为以增加总体成功的可能性，可以把一个行为分成若干个部分并相继地学习每一个部分。
Strategy: Break down the behavior
策略：把行为分解
Almost all behaviors can be broken down. Separate your desired behavior into smaller, self-contained units.
几乎所以的行为都可以分解。把你想要的行为分解成更小的，独立的单位。
He wanted to be on time for work, so he wrote down what that would entail: waking up, showering, dressing, preparing breakfast, eating, driving, parking and buying coffee—all before 9 a.m.
他想要按时工作，所以他把需要做到的都写下来：起床、淋浴、更衣、准备早餐、吃饭、开车上班、停车和买咖啡——所有的这些都要在早晨9点之前完成。
2.Change Is Frightening
2.改变是令人害怕的。
We resist change, but fear of the unknown can result in clinging to status quo behaviors—no matter how bad they are.
我们抵抗改变，是因为对未知的恐惧可能会让我们更加依附着现状的行为——不管现状是如何的不好。
Strategy: Examine the consequences
策略：检查结果
Compare all possible consequences of both your status quo and desired behaviors. If there are more positive results associated with the new behavior, your fears of the unknown are unwarranted.
比较所有可能的结果，包括你的现状和你想要的行为。如果伴随新的行为的是更多的积极的结果，你对未知的担心就是毫无根据的了。
If he didn't become more punctual, the next thing he'd be late for is the unemployment office. There was definitely a greater benefit to changing than to not changing.
如果他不是变得更为守时，接下来他可能不能准时赶到失业办公室。当然，如果这样的话，不做改变更为有利。
Strategy: Prepare your observers
策略：让观察者做好思想准备
New behaviors can frighten the people observing them, so introduce them slowly.
新的行为会惊吓到那些观察到他们的人，所以要慢慢的采用新行为。
Becoming timely overnight would make co-workers suspicious. He started arriving by 9 a.m. only on important days.
一夜之间就变得很准时会让同事们起疑的。他只在重要的日子里在早晨9点准时赶到。
Strategy: Be realistic
策略：追求现实
Unrealistic goals increase fear. Fear increases the probability of failure.
不现实的目标会增加恐惧感。而恐惧又会增加失败的可能性。
Mornings found him sluggish, so he began preparing the night before and doubled his morning time.
早上的时间太短经常会让他感到疲倦，所以他晚上就准备好来加倍早上的时间。
3.Change Must Be Positive
3.改变必须是积极的
As B.F. Skinner's early research demonstrates, reinforcement-not punishment-is necessary for permanent change. Reinforcement can be intrinsic, extrinsic or extraneous. According to Carol Sansone, Ph.D., a psychology professor at the University of Utah, one type of reinforcement must be present for self-change, two would be better than one, and three would be best.
就像Ｂ.F斯金纳早期的研究证明的那样，强化——而不是惩罚——对永久的改变是必须的。强化可以是内在的、外在的或无关的。犹他大学的心理学教授，卡罗尔·桑松尼博士说：对个人的改变来说，一种强化是必须的、两种类型的强化就更好了，如果有三种那就再好不过了。
Strategy: Enjoy the act
策略：享受行动
Intrinsic reinforcement occurs when the act is reinforcing.
当行动加强时内在的强化就出现了。
He loved dressing well. Seeing his clothes laid out at night was a joyful experience.
他喜欢穿着入时。看着他的衣服在夜里陈列出来是件欢快的体验。
Strategy: Admire the outcome
策略：赞赏结果
An act doesn't have to be enjoyable when the end result is extrinsically reinforcing. For instance, I hate cleaning my kitchen, but I do it because I like the sight of a clean kitchen.
一个行动并不一定是令人愉快的，而是最终的结果得到了外在的强化。举例来说，我讨厌清洁厨房，但我还是因为喜欢看到一个整洁的厨房而做了。
After dressing, he looked in the mirror and enjoyed the payoff from his evening preparation: He looked impeccable.
着装后，他对镜自照，欣赏着他晚上准备的结果：他看上去是那么的完美无瑕。
Strategy: Reward yourself
策略：奖励你自己
Extraneous reinforcement isn't directly connected to the act or its completion. A worker may despise his manufacturing job but will continue working for a good paycheck.
无关的外在强化不是直接跟行动或行动的实现联系在一起的。一个工人可能会轻视他的生产工作，但是仍然会为了更好的收入继续工作。
Whenever he met his target, he put $20 into his Hawaii vacation fund.
当他完成了目标，他会把20美金存入他的夏威夷度假基金之中。
4.Being Is Easier Than Becoming
4.存在比变成更容易
In my karate class of 20 students, the instructor yelled, "No pain, no gain," amid grueling instructions. After four weeks, only three students remained. Uncomfortable change becomes punishing, and rational people don't continue activities that are more painful than they are rewarding.
在我的20个学生的空手道的班级里，教练叫喊着：“没有付出就没有回报”，期间还有各种惩罚的说明。四周之后，只剩下三个学生。不舒服的变化变成了惩罚，理性的人就不会继续与他们得到的奖励相比痛苦更多的行动。
Strategy: Take baby steps
策略：一小步一小步的改变
In one San Francisco State University study, researchers found that participants were more successful when their goals were gradually approximated. Write down the behavior you want to change. Then to the right, write your goal. Draw four lines between the two and write a progressive step on each that takes you closer to your goal.
在旧金山大学的一项研究中，研究者发现当目标是逐步接近的时候，参与都更容易成功。把你想要改变的行为写下来。在右侧写下你的目标。在想要改变的行为和目标之间画四条线在每条线上写下能让你更接受目标的前进的步骤。
The first week, he would arrive by 9:20 a.m., then five minutes earlier each subsequent week until he achieved his goal.
在第一周里，他可能会在早晨9：20的时候到达，然后在接下来的几周里每周再提前5分钟直到他达到目标能够准时上班。
Strategy: Simplify the process
策略：简化过程
Methods of changing are often unnecessarily complicated and frenetic. Through simplicity, clarity arises.
改变的方法常常是过度不必要的复杂和狂热。要简单、清晰地提高。
Instead of waiting in line at Starbucks, he would buy coffee in his office building.
没有必要在星巴克门前排队等候，他保以在他公司的大楼里买咖啡。
Strategy: Prepare for problems
策略：做好准备来应对问题
Perfect worlds don't exist, and neither do perfect learning situations. Pamela Dunston, Ph.D., of Clemson University, found cueing to be an effective strategy.
完美的世界是不存在的，完美的学习环境也是不存在的。克莱姆森大学的帕梅拉·丹斯通博士发现暗示是一个很有效的策略。
His alarm clock failed to rouse him, so for the first month he'd use a telephone wake-up service.
他的闹钟没有把他叫醒，所以，第一个月他就采用电话叫醒业务。
5.Slower Is Better
5.越慢越好
Everything has its own natural speed; when altered, unpleasant things happen. Change is most effective when it occurs slowly, allowing behaviors to become automatic.
每件事都有他自然的速度；当被改变的时候，令人不愉快的事情就会发生。当改变慢慢发生时就会很有效果，让行为自然而然的改变。
Strategy: Establish calm
策略：保持安宁
Life is like a stirred-up lake: Allow it to calm and the mud will settle, clearing the water. The same is true for change.
生活就想激起涟漪的湖水：让他安静下来，泥沙就会沉淀下来，湖水也变得澄澈。改变也是如此。
To make mornings less harried, he no longer ran errands on his way to work.
为了让早晨少一份烦扰，他不再在上班的路上办小差事了。
Strategy: Appreciate the path
策略：感激改变过程
Author Ursula LeGuin once said, "It's good to have an end to journey toward; but it is the journey that matters, in the end." Don't devise an arduous path; it should be as rewarding as the goal.
作者厄休拉·勒古恩说过：“一段旅程有一个终点是很好的，但最终还是旅程的经历更为重要。”不要设计艰难的路途，旅途应该像结果那样有益。
He enjoyed almost everything involved in being punctual. The coffee could be better, but it was a small price to pay.
他享受着为了准时要做的每件事情。也许星巴克的咖啡更好喝，但那只是为了准时付出的很小的代价。
6.Know More, Do Better
6.知道更多，做的更好。
Surprise spells disaster for people seeking change. Knowing more about the process allows more control over it.
对寻求改变的人来说，惊喜会招致灾祸。对过程知道的更多给了你更多的机会控制这一过程。
Strategy: Monitor your behaviors
策略：监视你的行为
Some therapists insist on awareness of both current and desired behaviors, but research suggests it's sufficient to be aware of just the new one.
一些治疗专家坚持要求要认识目前的行为和想要的行为，但是研究显示只关注新的行为会更加有效。
In a journal, he recorded the time taken for each step of work preparation.
在日记里，他记录了每一部准备工作花费的时间。
Strategy: Request feedback
策略：要求反馈
A study in the British Journal of Psychology found that reflecting on personal experiences with others is key to successful change. But because complimenting new behavior implies that the observer disliked the old one, it can make observers feel uncomfortable. If, for example, you were once demeaning to people, few would now say, "It's nice talking with you since you stopped being a jerk." Give the observer permission, suggests Paul Schutz, Ph.D., of the University of Georgia, and you will receive feedback.
英国心理学杂志上的一项研究发现向他人反思个人经历是成功改变的关键。但是因为称赞新的行为暗示观察者不喜欢旧的行为，这会让观察者感觉不舒服。举例来说，如果你曾经贬低别人，几乎没有人会说：“如果你不那么油脂的话，跟你交谈还挺好的。”乔治亚大学的保罗·舒兹博士说：给观察者许可，你就能得到反馈。
Every Friday he asked a friend how well he was doing with his time problem.
没周五他都会询问一个朋友，在时间问题上他做的怎么样。
Strategy: Understand the outcome
策略：理解结果
Success is satisfying, and if you know why you succeeded or failed, similar strategies can be applied when changing other behaviors.
成功是令人满足的，如果你知道你成功货失败的原因，当你改变其他行为的时候就可以采用类似的策略。
Every morning, he analyzed why he did or did not arrive to work on time.
每天造成，他都会分析他为什么会准时工作了或者没有按时到达。
7.Change Requires Structure
7.改变需要组织构建
Many people view structure as restrictive, something that inhibits spontaneity. While spontaneity is wonderful for some activities, it's a surefire method for sabotaging change.
许多人把组织构建视为限制，会限制自发性的东西。然而自发性对某些行动来说却是很好的，这无疑是中会妨碍改变的方法。
Strategy: Identify what works
策略：确定什么在起作用
Classify all activities and materials you're using as either helpful, neutral or unhelpful in achieving your goal. Eliminate unhelpful ones, make neutrals into positives and keep or increase the positives.
把所有的行为和你用到的资料分类为：有用的、中性的或者对达到目标没有帮助的。排除那些没有帮助的部分，把中性的变成积极的并保持或增加积极的部分。
After evaluating his morning routine, he replaced time-consuming breakfasts with quick protein drinks.
在评价了他早晨的日常工作之后，他用速溶植物蛋白饮料取代了耗时的早餐。
Strategy: Revisit your plan regularly
策略：定期检查计划
Review every day how and why you're changing and the consequences of success and failure. Research by Daniel Willingham, Ph.D., a psychology professor at the University of Virginia, showed that repetition increases the probability of success.
回顾每天你是如何改变的以及为什么要改变，并反省成功和失败的后果。弗吉尼亚大学的心理学教授丹尼尔·威灵汉博士的研究显示重复增加了成功的可能性。
Each night he reviewed his plan, smiled and said, "Hawaii, here I come."
没晚他都会回顾他的计划，笑着说：“夏威夷，我来了。”
Strategy: Logically sequence events
策略：符合逻辑的事件序列
According to behavior expert Richard Foxx, Ph.D., a psychology professor at Penn State University at Harrisburg, it's important to sequence the aspects associated with learning a new behavior in order of level of difficulty or timing.
哈里斯堡宾州州立大学的心理学教授，行为专家理查德·福克斯博士说：为了使新行为在难度和时间上符合逻辑，安排好新行为的诸方面是很重要的。
He completed all bathroom activities, then ate breakfast.
他完成所有的洗漱活动，然后再吃早餐。
8.Practice Is Necessary
8.练习是必须的。
Practice is another key approach to change, suggests one study on changing conscious experience published recently in the British Journal of Psychology. I've found that the majority of failures occur because this principle is ignored. Practice makes new behaviors automatic and a natural part of who we are.
最近发布在英国心理学杂志上的一项关于意识经验的改变的研究表明：练习是另一个改变取得成功的关键。我已经知道大多数失败的发生是因为这条原则被忽略了。练习让新行为自然发生并成为我们的一部分。
Strategy: Use helpers
策略：利用帮助者
Not all behaviors can be learned on your own. Sometimes it's useful to enlist the help of a trusted friend.
并不是所有的行为都可以一个人独自学会的。有时让一个信任的朋友帮助我们会很有用的。
When even the telephone answering service failed to wake him up, he asked his secretary to call.
当电话应答业务不能把他叫醒的时候，他要求秘书把他叫醒。
Strategy: Practice in many settings
策略：在很多场景练习
If you want to use a new behavior in different environments, practice it in those or similar settings. Dubbing this "generalization," psychologists T.F. Stokes and D.M. Baer found it critical in maintaining new behaviors.
如果你想在不同的环境中运用新行为，在这些环境或类似的情形中练习。心理学家T.F.斯托克斯和贝尔博士把练习普遍化是维持新行为的关键。
During the first week he would try to be punctual for work. The following week, he would try to be on time for his regularly scheduled tennis game.
在第一周他也许会尽力准时工作。随后的星期中，他可能会在通常的安排好的网球比赛中准时到场。
9.New Behaviors Must Be Protected
9.新的行为必须保护。
Even when flawlessly performed, new behaviors are fragile and disappear if unprotected.
即使你已经执行的很完美了，新的行为是脆弱的，如果不保护好的话，很容易就消失了。
Strategy: Control your environment
策略：控制你的环境
Environmental issues such as noise and level of alertness may interfere with learning new behaviors. After identifying what helps and what hinders, increase the helpers and eliminate the rest.
环境问题诸如噪音和警戒的水平也许会妨碍新行为的学习。当确定了什么是有帮助的，什么是有妨碍的后，增加有帮助的部分，排除其他部分。
Having a nightcap before bed made it difficult to wake up in the morning, so he avoided alcohol after 7 p.m.
睡觉前喝点酒让他早晨醒来更困难，所以下午7点以后他不再饮酒。
Strategy: Use memory aides
策略：使用记忆助手
Because a new behavior is neither familiar nor automatic, it's easy to forget. Anything that helps memory is beneficial.
因为一个新行为既不熟悉也不是自动发生的，很容易忘记。任何对记忆有帮助的东西都是有益的。
He kept a list in each room of his apartment describing the sequence of things to be done and the maximum allowable time to complete them.
他在公寓的每间房里都留了一个目录，上面按顺序列满了要完成的事情和完成他们的最长时间。
10.Small Successes Are Big
10.小的成功也是大的胜利
Unfortunately, plans for big successes often result in big failures. Focus instead on a series of small successes. Each little success builds your reservoir of self-esteem; one big failure devastates it.
不幸的是，伟大的成功计划常常导致巨大的失败。要关注一系列的小成功。没一个小的成功都让自信的储蓄池更满，而一个巨大的失败就会毁灭它。
Strategy: Map your success
策略：绘制成功的地图
Approach each step as a separate mission and you'll eventually arrive at the end goal.
把每一部作为一个单独的任务来完成，最后你终会达到目标。
For each morning activity he completed within his self-allotted time limit, he rewarded himself by putting money into his Hawaii-getaway fund.
对每个早晨的行动他都会在自己分配好的时间内完成，并把钱存入夏威夷度假基金里来奖励自己。
The process of changing from what you are to what you would like to become can be either arduous and frustrating or easy and rewarding. The effort required for both paths is the same. Choose the first and you'll probably recycle yourself endlessly. Apply my 10 principles, and change, once only a slight possibility, becomes an absolute certainty. The choice is yours.
从现在的你变成你想成为的自己的过程可能是艰辛和令人沮丧的，也可以是容易且值得的。两种道路都需要你付出相同的努力。选择第一条道路你将很可能不断地重复自己。运用我的十条原则来改变吧。即使只有很微小的可能性也要让它变成绝对的必然。由你来做决定。。。。。。
0 件のコメント:
コメントを投稿